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I have some really bad news

Whining under the cut, sorry to clutter people's f-list with this but I feel bad about not saying anything


I've been really quiet on the sims front because my hand is almost unusable. Then to compound that I fell and landed on my hands and it bent the wrist and hand almost double, luckily because it hasn't a very hard fall I just sprained it again (2nd degree) but the xrays concerned the ER docs enough that they referred me to completely different Orthopedic specialist, apparently the lack of healing of the hand/wrist caused quite a bit of concern and even though they tried to downplay it surgery was mentioned twice. I have the appointment on Tuesday. The first one stopped PT after 2 weeks, saying that it should naturally heal from that as long I take it easy.

I've already been battling severe depression over the whole thing, because no one really understands how much meshing and simming mean to me. I've been going to therapy(mental health) for about 4 weeks now and although he says that losing the ability to enjoy or participate in an hobby can be upsetting, I can tell he doesn't get how much of my life I have spent with the sims and the impact it has had on me, my life and sanity.

 

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( 16 comments — Leave a comment )
shastakiss
Sep. 29th, 2012 03:15 am (UTC)
Oh no! I'm so sorry to hear your hand isn't healing well :(
And your therapist doesn't get it? Can you change to a different one? I hope the new specialist can help and maybe they'll set you up with a new pt who can help too.

Whining? I think it's healthy to let your sim friends know you could use a little support. You're doing everything you should - HUG!
pkheartznroses
Sep. 29th, 2012 02:27 pm (UTC)
Thank you Shastakiss, I'm hoping that new therapists in both functions will help me get on track both physically and mentally.

You guys have honestly made me feel better than I have in weeks.
lovelyxwow
Sep. 29th, 2012 03:27 am (UTC)
I don't agree that they stopped PT--while it can heal naturally, I still think that hand therapy would be beneficial. I'm terribly sorry to hear that things are even worse.

I wish that there was a way you could play the sims somehow or mesh with your left hand or something. I can understand how bad it feels to be witdrawn from the sims. Do you have any ideas for how to play? I would love to help out.
pkheartznroses
Sep. 29th, 2012 02:35 pm (UTC)
Jessy, I was a little dismayed they stopped PT so soon, but I figured since they were the professionals they knew best. I've tried left handing it with the sims. It works semi ok for TS3, but for TS2 not so much and forget meshing. I tried to do a simple shoe swap and before I got done with the first few of vertices I realized that it was not going to work. It's times like these I wish I were ambidextrous.

When I start really feeling bad I do crank up S3 but it gets very boring, possibly because I really don't connect with the game, however Supernatural did hold my interest for a couple of days. But really all it did was make me miss the S2 more. I'd even pretty much browsing tumblr, lj and dw, but when I talked to the MH therapist Thursday he said that maybe I should still browse and participate vicariously, didn't work out that way. Instead it made me sadder. But I'm going to working on breaking out of this depression. You guy's responses made me realize that I'm more than a mesher, I'm still a member of a thriving, vital comm full of wonderful and caring people.
lovelyxwow
Sep. 29th, 2012 08:13 pm (UTC)
Yeah, I was going to suggest being on tumblr reading stories or looking at pictures but I would think that would actually make things worse.

I hope you can break out of your depression and we all still care about! Get well, Jacci. If you'd ever want to talk about anything, shoot me a pm or add me on msn or something like that. You're not alone. :)
pkheartznroses
Sep. 30th, 2012 07:29 pm (UTC)
I added you and screened jic you wanted that bit private :)
xgoat
Sep. 29th, 2012 04:35 am (UTC)
Sorry to hear! That has to be so frustrating, that you have to use the computer one-handed, and that your therapist isn't very understanding.

I'm here to help or listen if you need it.
pkheartznroses
Sep. 29th, 2012 02:37 pm (UTC)
Thank you so much Goat. I do have to admit having to be one-handed is not fun, but I did but this fancy laptop with the multi-gesture touchpad that I've never used really until recently. It does take a lot of the stress of scrolling and clicking and such.
:)

Thanks so much for being here for me.
jbeach34
Sep. 29th, 2012 08:22 am (UTC)
Oh Jackie...NO!!!!!
I am sooo sorry to hear that you've taken a turn for the worst! Man, that sucks! I getcha!!! I know exactly how ya feel, too! No simming! And NO meshing!!! That bites!!!

Whining my a@@! You did the right thing in turning to your 'understanding' simming friends!!! If ANYONE'S going to understand, it would be us!!! :P

If there's anything I can do at all to help out.... Or if you just need an ear to vent in...don't hesitate!!! PM me if ya want! ;) But, whatever you do, don't sit in your room all by your lonesome and beat yourself up for something that's not your fault! (At least, not totally!!! ;) ...your fault!)

I'll keep ya in my prayers for a speedier recovery!
<3 <3 <3
pkheartznroses
Sep. 29th, 2012 02:39 pm (UTC)
G-Knee thanks for the prayers, they are truly appreciated. And you pegged it, I have withdrawn to my room and have limited contact with pretty much everyone. Have to stop that, it's like being on a pity-bender or binge. Gotta stop it.
trappingit
Sep. 29th, 2012 10:46 am (UTC)
Oh no, that's just awful! I'm so sorry people aren't understanding and/or getting the whole picture of the problem. I know how it must feel and just hang in there, the wrist must heal at some point (hopefully sooner than later). And I'm also sorry about how you fell and sprained it again. It must be very frustrating seeing how close you must have been to have it atleast partly healed ):
Just want you to know that you're missed and that I'd be very surprised if not everyone (or even most people) in the community are wishing that your wrist could heal faster. Take care and try not to trip again <3
Oh, and I know this is just a drip on the ocean for most, but unless it isn't for you, once again, don't worry about the trades at TBTO. If you want them then, they'll still be there when your wrist is capable of doing what you want it to be able to do again <3
pkheartznroses
Sep. 29th, 2012 02:42 pm (UTC)
Lina, I know you know more than many what I'm going through and it means a lot to me that you understand what I'm going through. You also hit the nail on the head, I have the mock-up and notes for my stalled BTO trades on my bulletin board and it seems that they are staring at me accusingly everyday. I can't bring myself to take them down.
needlecream
Sep. 29th, 2012 04:01 pm (UTC)
*hugs for all eternity* I am so sorry! I think a lot of simmers can agree that people don't always understand how much this "hobby" and community can mean to us.
I hope your hand heals soon, but surely it will heal and when it does you will sim again!

If there's anything I can do, just give me a shout! <3 <3
pkheartznroses
Sep. 29th, 2012 04:08 pm (UTC)
*hugs right back* Thanks for the positive affirmation, I have to believe that all will be well. After doing research this morning on the 'net, I'm almost for the surgery because it may be the most effective, but I know they are going to let me know for sure Tuesday, I just don't want this lingering on much longer.

And I will give you a shout, did you ever get back to your project with the men's stuff? If nothing else I'm great for advice and pointers if you are stuck somewhere :)
lvstndhrt
Sep. 29th, 2012 04:02 pm (UTC)
I can relate to your story a little bit. I know exactly how hard it is to have to give up something you love doing. I tried to learn to be ambidextrous to continue playing the sims on days where it became too painful. Let me tell you, that isn't easy to do! Especially with the fine motor skills required for meshing.

I hope the new therapists are able to help you. Its not fun having the things you love to do taken away from you. :( Our hands are so important and so fragile at the same time...
pkheartznroses
Sep. 29th, 2012 04:23 pm (UTC)
I would have never understood the fragility of my hand much less ever considered the idea that I couldn't physically do something I wanted to do until this happened. I have to believe that it is a lesson that I have to learn. One thing I've already learned is to stop taking even the normal, mundane things for granted, also to be thankful because there are so many people with far greater limitations than the ones I face.
( 16 comments — Leave a comment )